The Conversation
by DressagePunk
Summary: Well, once you become a man of a certain age, you're not always able to procure certain illicit substances. A stoned Hermione is caught by Sirius, Hilarity ensues.


The Conversation

The wind whipped through the little alley that lay behind the Grimmauld Place structure. The wind was strong enough to take any unpleasant smell away from Hermione as she sat on the stoop with a joint laced in her fingers.

Her business chic dress was untied at the neck, leaving little of her top half to the imagination. Her shoes had been kicked off before stepping outside and her robes were thrown on the interior of the door.

The haze and motion of color and sound started to overtake her. As suddenly it felt as if she could smell the wind, and taste the night sky. All her fears from work, and her not so exciting engagement to Ron flew out with the wind.

The joint got smaller and smaller, and when it got to a point where it was burning the tips of her finger she incinerated the remains with her wand and walked back within the house.

Sirius was sitting in the basement kitchen of Grimmauld place, when a giggling Hermione snuck in the back door. Her dress was all but falling off her, and her hair was blown twelve ways to Sunday. It kind of looked like sex hair. Was perfect little Hermione having a sexual rendezvous with someone behind the house?

Ron was out of the country on business, so whatever she was up to wasn't completely on the straight and narrow. She seemed completely oblivious to him though as she rummaged through the refrigerator, pulling out ice cream and a jar of caramel.

The container was only half full but she popped the top off, dumped in the caramel in the container and started up the stairs with a single spoon.

"Oi Hermione." Sirius said as the ball of her foot hit the stairs.

She paused but seriously contemplated running up the stairs away from him.

She turned around and sat down at the table opposite to him. And at that moment the tie to her dress fell completely off fully allowing her top half to be exposed with the exception of the sheer lace bra that covered her breasts. He noticed her blood shot eyes, her need to devour the bucket of ice cream in front of her and her insistent need to drain every old water glass that currently cluttered the table.

She was high. Hermione fucking Granger was high out of her mind. Yet, that wasn't the most troubling part of the whole situation. The troubling part was the instantaneous jealousy that washed over Sirius. He hadn't gotten high sense James had Harry. Lily had made them stop.

"Are you high Hermione?" he questioned

A blush grew over her checks and as she thickly swallowed the bite of ice cream residing in her mouth she said, "Well kind of, but it's truly medicinal. The healers say it's unhealthy to have so much stress so really I'm... I'm..." her thought trailed off and a vacant stare was placed in her eyes.

Yet in a split second comprehension was back as a piercing glint ran through her eyes, "Why does it matter Mr. Black."

He hated when she pulled the Mr. Black crap. On one hand he loved how it ascended a certain power over him, but hated on the other how it highlighted the age difference between them.

"Well 'Mione, once you become a man of a certain age, you're not always able to procure certain illicit substances." he smirked

Her eyes started to blank but she quickly smirked back, "So Mr. Black you want to share a joint with me?" she wiggled her finger inviting him to follow her up the stairs. He followed her quickly up the steps as she reached the library.

He stepped in to see her grabbing a book, something from the Muggle world; it had an Apple on the cover with hands or something. Honestly, Muggle books always seemed rather dull.

She flipped open the book to reveal a cut out in which a few joints were carefully placed. She grabbed two closing the book and stepping down.

Handing one to him she grabbed for a lighter in her dress pocket but the pocket was covered by the still fallen top half of the dress. She finally managed to grab it and lit the joint; taking a heavy pull she threw the lighter to Sirius.

The pair sat in reserved silence as the library started to fill with the smell of weed. Hermione's joint burned to a finish, just a moment before Sirius's did.

"Hermione, I'm horny." Sirius whined feeling the power of re drug mess with his body

"Me too, but I'm going to finish my ice cream and go to bed." Hermione tried to convince herself

"'Mione, will you please just join me for a glass of firewhisky?"

"Why not?" Hermione could feel the pot start to make her exceptionally sleepy

The glasses were poured and Hermione had half of her's gone before she set it down for the first time.

"Sirius, I've been head over tits in love you since we meet." as the hazy words slipped out of her mouth she brought her hand up to stop them but it was too late. He'd heard her. Of course he heard her. As she peaked out from her hands, he just cracked a smile.

"Hermione, Don't write a check with your mouth, that you can cash with your ass." he smirked

It took her a moment to comprehend what he meant but when she realized it, her eyed narrowed. "You wouldn't sleep with me, you think I'm a pretentious up tight bitch, just like every other bloody bloke." she countered.

"Oi, Hermione you can't actually believe that. Half the bloody men in the order want to shag you brains out. You're the one that put a stop to that with that rock on your finger." and with that Sirius stood, threw his glass into the roaring fire, and as the glass and liquor made a small explosion, he said, "I'm off to take a cold shower" as he waltzed out of the room.

And under heavy influence of pot, and alcohol Hermione ran after him pausing at the platform of the stairs, "I'm off to take a hot shower. It's like a normal bloody shower only with me in it." she screamed up the stairs. Sirius's footfalls stopped and she saw him peak around the corner.

"I already warned you about talking that way 'Mione." Sirius said racing down the stairs and pulling Hermione flush with his chest.

"Then what are you gonna do about it? Are you going to fuck me Sirius, or lecture me like my daddy?" she teased

The last part of that made his pants so uncomfortably tight it was hardly fair. He grabbed her and drug her up the stairs, before throwing her down on his bed. He climbed on top of he'd and slowly started kissing her collarbone as she pulled and tugged on his shirt, until he had the decency to yank it off himself.

He had pulled her bra off, and had started to tease her nipples with slight pinches, as their lips met. Honestly, Sirius was expecting the soft sensuous kisses that he'd seen Ron on the receiving end of, but he got a set of soft yet rough lips that pushed into his with as much force as a hippogriff.

He didn't even ask before thrusting his tongue into her mouth. Their tongues became a dance of passion, of sense and of fierce emotions. Her dress hit the floor along with his slacks and soon enough, they both lay naked on one another. Hermione was kissing the series of Greek letter tattooed as Sirius picked her up and thrusted into her in a single fast stroke.

He felt her muscles quiver in response and she quickly breathed deeply to regain her composure.

"You're not a virgin are you 'Mione?" Sirius said with a grin

"Nope, but you're a bloody bit bigger than Ron." she replied before starting to swing her hips getting used to the girth now wedged in-between her legs.

Sirius just laughed and replied with a, "Chinese Fire Drill".

Hermione just gave him a curious look as he laughed and mumbled something about cars and running at stoplights.

She was quickly flipped over as Sirius moved quickly in and out of her, forcing her body further into the mattress as he moved. Her hips matched his thrust for thrust and as her internal muscles started to quiver she moaned into his shoulder, biting the soft flesh.

"Sirius."

"Yes... 'Mione" said Sirius rather labored

"Harder, please."

"Please what"

"Please, Mr. Black harder." she screamed as her walls collapsed milking his prick for everything it was possibly worth. He moaned in an identical fashion.

And the pair fell asleep as a tangle of sheets, limbs, and sweat.

The next morning Sirius woke up to an empty bed. He finally managed to pull himself out of bed and as he reached the door a note and a bag was charmed on.

The note simply said 'Thanks' and the bag when opened revealed about an ounce of weed. He smiled, that had to have been one of the best nights of his life.

AN: I love reviews :)


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